Reviews
Mandie Hickenbottom-Conner"" I just finished watching the film. I literally could not control the tears. I am the daughter of an adoptee who was born to an Irish teenager in 1960. I watched my mother struggle her whole life to track down her "history" and "past" and... "truth". I was there through it all - all of her pain and bewilderment and more. It took a bout with cancer for just a tiny bit of information to be released to my mom about her birth mother. She has since found her biological mom's side of the family and has made contact - something she worked decades to achieve.
Now, I am 30 years old; and I am struggling with infertility myself. I watch films like this and see the anger in the filmmakers voice as he talks about being adopted, and I wonder if my husband and I adopt if our child will always resent us only because we weren't blessed enough to conceive him/her ourselves. Is adoption worth it? Are all adoptees just wishing they could run away and be with their birth parents, no matter what the circumstance? I am full of emotions right now. I am so full of sadness for adoptees who are wondering about their truths and histories. I am so sad for the birth moms who wonder about their biological children and miss them or those who were pretty much forced into giving their children up for adoption. And yet, I am sad for those who are infertile or those who just choose to adopt (whether infertility has a role to play or not), because I know (because I am going through it) that they are constantly wondering how to do what's best for their child (who just so happens to be adopted), etc.
This was an interesting film. I sort of wish it were a series...now you need to talk more in depth with more adoptees and adoptive parents, etc.
Now, I am 30 years old; and I am struggling with infertility myself. I watch films like this and see the anger in the filmmakers voice as he talks about being adopted, and I wonder if my husband and I adopt if our child will always resent us only because we weren't blessed enough to conceive him/her ourselves. Is adoption worth it? Are all adoptees just wishing they could run away and be with their birth parents, no matter what the circumstance? I am full of emotions right now. I am so full of sadness for adoptees who are wondering about their truths and histories. I am so sad for the birth moms who wonder about their biological children and miss them or those who were pretty much forced into giving their children up for adoption. And yet, I am sad for those who are infertile or those who just choose to adopt (whether infertility has a role to play or not), because I know (because I am going through it) that they are constantly wondering how to do what's best for their child (who just so happens to be adopted), etc.
This was an interesting film. I sort of wish it were a series...now you need to talk more in depth with more adoptees and adoptive parents, etc.
Heather McClane"" I just watched the movie and as a birth mother, hearing your pain, your questions and your grief were very painful for me. I have to say though that I am so happy that you have taken on this movie endeavor as you have allowed me a glimpse of the pain you have felt regarding your adoption. It also is extremely relieving to know as a birth mother I am not alone in the pain I have suffered since relinquishment. I have read some reviews where people couldn't understand and the simple fact is, that unless you walked in our shoes in the days leading up to relinquishment you will never understand. That's just how it is. I wanted nothing more than to parent. However, the situation didn't allow for it. Thats all there is to say. I dont need anyones understanding nor their sympathy. It was my decision and I made the best one for me and mine. I have loved mine since birth and always will love. Thank you for sharing this with us! It was an eye opener!
David Wayne Very powerful. If your an adoptee, bring lots of kleenex to the viewing.
Marcia MacInnis Congratulations. You've added a dimension to adoption that is very unique and valuable. Only wish that it weren't so difficult to hear you, especially the part where graphics and music are superimposed over your image. I think your words at that particular point are extremely important to hear. I'm an adoptee and feel as you do. I'm also a single mother by choice and took on that responsibility in 1969.
Beth Johnson"" I just watched Related By Birth what a awesome story...I think that all adoptions should be open...There are so many reason's why but one of the main reason's is for health reason's.... People need to know their health history. That is so very important...I think it is such a beautiful thing for a mother to give birth and give her child up for adoption instead of killing her child with abortion....
Arlene Young Donovan"" You have a beautifully powerful film here.
Leanne Reeves Gower I finally got through it yesterday. I shed a lot of tears. I found it so powerful that you let the world see your anger. I have that same anger. Have never felt like it was okay to be angry, but I am. And anger is just the tip of the emotional iceberg for me. I believe that this has unlocked a door to my healing process through the honesty of the birth mothers. So many things I have needed to hear. There are so many complex issues surrounding adoption that follow you throughout life, thank you for making more people aware!
Jen Hall"" fabulous effort, nice compilation. I, too, would like to hear more from the perspective of the adopted child. I am an adoptive parent in an open adoption. I was able to spend a very special week with my son and his birth mother, when he was born. Now we talk on his birthday, we exchange letters and pictures, he has another half sister nearby. My son (4 yrs old now) knows that he grew in Niki's belly and in my heart, he knows that Niki is a very special person in our lives - we have pictures of her in our living room. I tell him all the time that Niki loves him. I empathize and honor her, always.
Christine Warmus Murphy"" I was very touched by all the emotion. It is so important for people to understand that adoption is not the win-win-win situation that society would like it to be. There is great sadness, hurt, anger and grief for all sides of the triad. Times are changing in terms of open adoption and such and moms are able to have more contact. But open adoption is not a "cure." Society needs to view the bond between mother and child as sacred and do absolutely everything possible before that bond is broken.
Priscilla Sharp It's a great work! I hope you get lots of airtime.
Gayle Jenkins This is a good documentary to open the doors of communication regarding adoption...especially for the birthmother. Many people have no idea what its like to place a child and the psychologial effect it has on her. This would be good for others to understand the trauma, although all was done with good intentions. I wish we could eliminate the term 'born out of wedlock'...its archaic. The divorce rate is through the roof!
Sharon Foster"" Being the mother of an adopted daughter this documentary helped me to understand how her birthmother possibly has felt for the past 23 years. My daughter was born in S Korea. Thank you for your work.
Susie Dirks-Gill"" I liked the movie in that it shows four mothers dispelling some of the myths of life after giving a child up for adoption. You do not "just get on with your life" as it was before you became a mother. Life is forever changed. You are a mom. Without your child. You don't just walk away and forget your child, never looking back.
I related mostly to Bonnie, least understood Agatha. Most first moms I know would have given their right arm to have family support like she did, family who encouraged, rather than discouraged, parenting.
I related mostly to Bonnie, least understood Agatha. Most first moms I know would have given their right arm to have family support like she did, family who encouraged, rather than discouraged, parenting.
Melissa SheltonI can't even begin to express my emotions right now. I am heart broken by this documentary but I think it is because these women represent what my birthmother doesn't. I need to regroup and post my thoughts later.
Scobie from Seattle ... it's freaking fantastic. It's SO important to get stories of adoption OUT there. And it's SO important to not whitewash the core tragedy inherent to adoption, and not whitewash the many many avenues of subtle (and TOTALLY NOT subtle) coercion and abuse that can creep into the process. Why do I think this is important?.... so that people can STOP doing it stupidly, blindly, so that people do it less often, and so that when it IS the right thing to do, that the adults and professionals involved do everything they can to prevent ignorance and abuse, and everyone is wide awake to the pain and imperfection of it. Everyone involved needs to be working for what's best for the child and to preserve the rights of the mother, and to preserve every kind of love that can be preserved for the child and mother.
I can't imagine any more powerful way to get to the heart of that than to go straight to the stories of birth mothers. And your own pain is an incredible contribution to the message, and a rare voice, raw and honest. This film will make a difference.
So, I'm basically saying BRAVO.
I can't imagine any more powerful way to get to the heart of that than to go straight to the stories of birth mothers. And your own pain is an incredible contribution to the message, and a rare voice, raw and honest. This film will make a difference.
So, I'm basically saying BRAVO.
Steve Barton"" I really enjoyed the film. I do believe that it will help all of us adoptees see the point of view of the birthmothers. The only thing I wished there was, was having another adoptee telling his/her feelings. I did relate to a few points you made, Gregg. But dont feel the same on others. Other than that very good job and thanks for taking the time to put it together.
Peggy Thank you all for for your honesty and openness of your stories. May you all be blessed and loved. I am a 1st mother and at the age of 18 was forced to give up my child by very strick devout catholic parents. I have lived my life regretting what I was forced to do. I hope someday that my child/adult understands that this was not done to hurt her, this was actually the punishment my parents felt I deserved for having pre-marital sex. It has been 30 years and I continue to pray she will understand and forgive me.
Angela Lyle Watched the movie, as an adoptee i had no idea that the biological mother had to go through, it's kinda nice to know that adoptees aren't the only ones hurting. I think about my biological mother everyday it's nice to know that they think about us. would love to see more movies like this.
Jesse Schell"" I felt this film was interesting but one sided. As an adoptive parent and marred to a man who was adopted this was not our story. Not all adoptive parents just want the baby and forget about the birth parents once the adoption is complete, we would never have agreed to that. Our daughters birth parents are part of our family. We send photos and email and are in constant contact. Adoption does not have to hurt. Our children know their adoption story, no secrets. Our birth mothers often say how thankful they are to have found us. Adoption is a blessing if went into with respect, love and thinking of the child first. I enjoyed the different views in this film as it is very different from our own story.
Elena Shelly"" My mother had a son she gave up in the 1977 but she never talked about him. We knew about it but she never wanted to tell us the story of what happened or talk about how much pain she was in over it. My mother passed away some time ago and watching this movie helped me understand just a little better what it must have been like for her all those years. Like one of the woman said, she gave away her flesh and blood. It hurt her very much.
John P Ruggeri"" GREAT FILM!!!! I fully understand the whole "emotional roller coaster".... But now I have more to hang onto, knowing that maybe she still thinks of me everyday!!!! It was good for me to see and hear the stories of those women that had to ma...ke the toughest decision of their lives. And to remain hopeful that maybe just maybe, she is still searching for me.......
Ettie Lynn Martinez"" Great Film!!!!!
Joann DeVita"" Another emotion filled film about the never ending hurt that results from adoption. If you have been touched in anyway by the adoption process you will understand. If not, this will open your eyes to the lifelong struggle of the adopted child and the birth mother.
As an adoptee, I can tell you that the only happy people in the triad are the adoptive parents.
As an adoptee, I can tell you that the only happy people in the triad are the adoptive parents.